An English prisoner of war was held by the Germans. The Englishman was shot all over the place, and okay until one day when the German told him, “Englander, your arm is infected with gangrene we must cut it off.”
Archive for the ‘Funny Jokes’ Category
Funny German Jokes, Hilarious war jokes – English prisoner of war
Sunday, November 15th, 2009Thanksgiving jokes, Funny Thanksgiving Day jokes, Hilarious Thanksgiving joke – Thanksgiving Divorce
Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,”I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.
Fathers jokes, Dad jokes, Clean funny jokes – Waiting Room
Sunday, November 1st, 2009There were three fathers to be in a hospital waiting room, waiting for their babies to be born.
Halloween Beethoven jokes, funny ‘n’ scary Halloween jokes on Beethoven symphony
Saturday, October 24th, 2009A daring vacationer in Vienna is walking through a graveyard on Halloween when all of a sudden she hears music. No one is around, so she starts looking to see where it’s coming from.
Blonde jokes, funny blond joke – The blonde and two men
Sunday, October 11th, 2009A blonde woman was driving down the highway when her car broke down. She pulled to the side of the road, got out and opened the trunk of her car.
Two men dressed in trench coats got out of her trunk. They faced the oncoming traffic and proceeded to bare their nude bodies to the other drivers.
A cop drives up and asks the blonde, “What the hell is going on here?”
She tells him, “Well officer, my car broke down.”
He says, “Miss, I can see that, but why are these two men exposing themselves to the oncoming traffic?”
She says, “I didn’t want to cause an accident, so I’m using my emergency flashers!”
Funny political jokes, politics joke – Liberal Democrat Jokes – UK Political Party
Wednesday, October 7th, 2009Liberal Democrat Jokes ( UK Political Party )
Q: What do you get when you offer a Liberal a penny for his thoughts?
A: Change.
Q: How do you confuse a Liberal?
A: You don’t. They’re born that way.
Q: How do you keep a Liberal busy?
A: Write ‘Please turn over’ on both sides of a piece of paper.
Q: How do you keep a Liberal busy all day?
A: Put him in a round room and tell him to wait in the corner.
Q: How do you get a one-armed Liberal out of a tree?
A: Wave to him.
Q: What do you call a basement full of Liberals?
A: A whine cellar.
Q: What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A: 144 Liberals.
Q: What is the Liberal doing when he has his hands tightly clasped over his ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.
Q: Why did the Liberal have blisters on his lips?
A: From trying to blow out a light bulb.
Q: Why do Liberals work seven days a week?
A: So you don’t have to retrain them on Monday.
Q: What the difference between a Liberal and the rear end of a horse?
A: I don’t know either.
Q: How is a Liberal different from a sewer rat?
A: Some people actually like sewer rats.
Q: How many Liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They prefer to walk in the dark.
Q: What is it called when a Liberal blows in another Liberal’s ear?
A: Data transfer.
Q: Why don’t they let Liberals swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can’t get the smell out of the tuna.
Q: How do you plant dope?
A: Bury a Liberal.
Funny jokes – two trees and woodpecker
Wednesday, October 7th, 2009Two Trees
Two big trees are in the woods and they notice a young tree begins to grow between them. “Is that a son of a Beech or a son of a Birch?” asks one of the big trees.
“I don’t know,” says the other big tree.
A while later a Woodpecker lands on the young tree and one of the big trees asks, “Hey, Mr Woodpecker. Is that young tree a son of a Beech or a son of a Birch?”
The Woodpecker takes a nibble and replies, “It’s neither. It’s the best bit of Ash I’ve ever had my pecker in.”
Funny music jokes – Bagpiper
Monday, October 5th, 20091st man: “My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three o clock this morning!”
2nd man: “Did they wake you?”
Funny Hippie Jokes – What Gives?
Sunday, October 4th, 2009What Gives?
An old hippie dies and goes to the Pearly Gates. St. Peter looks him up in his big book and says, “I’m sorry, but you’ll be going down to Hell.” The hippie, astounded, peers through the gates and sees God walking in the distance.
Short Funny Jokes – 130th Edition
Sunday, October 4th, 2009A certain Congressman had disastrous experience in goldmine speculations. One day a number of colleagues were discussing the subject of his speculation, when one of them said to this Western member:
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