Are you interested in Golf Jokes? If you are a Golf lover or a Golfer yourself, you will definitely love these funny golf jokes. Golf Jokes on golf instruction, golf swing, golf course, golf tournament, golf shoes, golf tees, golf clubs, golf balls and golf lessons are very popular among golfers and in golf clubs. Here are some funny golf jokes for your fun.
Golfing With An Older Golfer
A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him.
To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn’t hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn’t waste much time. Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball – and directly between his ball and the green.
After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old man finally said, “You know, when I was your age I’d hit the ball right over that tree.”
With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard, hit the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.
The old man offered one more comment, “Of course, when I was your age that pine tree was only three feet tall.”
The Amazing Golf Ball
A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, “Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!”
The golfer, annoyed, says, “What is it?”
“It’s a special golf ball,” says the salesman. “You can never lose it!”
“What ya mean,” scoffs the golfer, “you can never lose it? What if you hit it into the water?”
“No problem,” says the salesman. “It floats, and it detects where the shore is, and spins towards it.”
“Well, what if you hit it into the woods?”
“Easy,” says the salesman. “It emits a beeping sound, and you can find it with your eyes closed.”
“Okay,” says the golfer, impressed. “But what if your round goes late and it gets dark?”
“No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I’m telling you, you can never lose this golf ball!”
The golfer buys it at once. “Just one question,” he says to the salesman. “Where did you get it?”
“I found it.”
Golf Lessons
A foursome was waiting at the men’s tee while another foursome of ladies were hitting from the ladies tee.
The ladies were taking their time and when finally the last one was ready to hit the ball she hacked it about 10 feet, went over to it, hacked it another ten feet.
She looked up at the men waiting and said apologetically,
“I guess all those f*u*c*k*i*n*g lessons I took this winter didn’t help”
One of the men immediately replied, “No, you see there’s your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead.”
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