Very Funny Jokes

The doctor told him he needed carbohydrates, proteids, and above all, something nitrogenous. The doctor mentioned a long list of foods for him to eat. He staggered out and wabbled into a Penn avenue restaurant.  Read more... (81 words, 11 images, estimated 19 secs reading time)

The late John Bigelow, the patriarch of diplomats and authors, and the no less distinguished physician and author, Dr. S. Weir Mitchell, were together, several years ago, at West Point. Dr. Bigelow was then ninety-two, and Dr. Mitchell eighty.  Read more... (144 words, 11 images, estimated 35 secs reading time)

“Mother,” asked the little one, on the occasion of a number of guests being present at dinner, “will the dessert hurt me, or is there enough to go round?”

By Jones

The seven-year-old daughter of a prominent suburban resident is, the neighbors say, a precocious youngster; at all events, she knows the ways of the world.  Read more... (119 words, 11 images, estimated 29 secs reading time)

Once, while Bishop Talbot, the giant “cowboy bishop,” was attending a meeting of church dignitaries in St. Paul, a tramp accosted a group of churchmen in the hotel porch and asked for aid.  Read more... (167 words, 11 images, estimated 40 secs reading time)

In China when the subscriber rings up exchange the operator may be expected to ask:

“What number does the honorable son of the moon and stars desire?”  Read more... (67 words, 11 images, estimated 16 secs reading time)

“Malachi,” said a prospective homesteader to a lawyer, “you know all about this law. Tell me what I am to do.”  Read more... (77 words, 11 images, estimated 18 secs reading time)

As one of the White Star steamships came up New York harbor the other day, a grimy coal barge floated immediately in front of her. “Clear out of the way with that old mud scow!” shouted an officer on the bridge.  Read more... (78 words, 11 images, estimated 19 secs reading time)

“See that man over there. He is a bombastic mutt, a windjammer nonentity, a false alarm, and an encumberer of the earth!”  Read more... (52 words, 11 images, estimated 12 secs reading time)

An Irishman once lined up his family of seven giant-like sons and invited his caller to take a look at them.

“Ain’t they fine boys?” inquired the father.  Read more... (58 words, 11 images, estimated 14 secs reading time)